Jizz

For those scrolling down: Time to wash up!

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Terrible!

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Hot!

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What's your sign? Seriously, what the hell did you show her?!?

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Mahhh-meee SHARKED! Doot-dooh-do-dooh-do-dooh...

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A bit of a stretch...

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Don't flinch!

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Soon...

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Somewhat Full of Bash...

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"If the path before you is clear, then you're probably on someone else." Or something like that...

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Does this count? Also, how does Steve Buscemi still not know how to use a camera?

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TIL roadside assistance in Europe is nothing like "Triple A"...

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Have you ever seen a girl stick her tongue out to the side when she's really concentrating on something? Just asking. No reason...

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Orange is the New Little Black Dress! Except that this is from a few years ago and, really, you're STILL reading this???

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Meanwhile, back in Kazakhstan...

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Therrre's no need to fear...

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Watch yo step! Trippin' balls!

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Scarlett, your favorite subreddit is called "Almost" WHAT?

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Open wide!

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A smirk is a perk!

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Just my five ladies and me, sharing recipes between loads of laundry outside of the Marina Bait & Laundromat...

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Streaks on the mirror...

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Subtle...

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Graphic...

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This is yours!

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Illuminaughty

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Right Angle

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Bad Guy

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My Femme Fatale and Her Five Guys

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The Art of Love, in the Fabulous 50s, as captured via cell phone...

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Yer a wizard, Gloria!

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"Strong" is the new "beautiful!"

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This is 911. What's your emergency?

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I get up! And nothing gets me down...

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Vintage Salma Hayek. Just because...

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That's not how you drin--

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Epstein didn't kill himself!

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Young Mimi thinks you're all PIGS!

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It only seems kinky the first time...

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This is how you know it was a good Thanksgiving...

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Beady Eyes

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You-know-what. You-know-who. You-know-why...

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"Fashion" is to "yachting" as "bikini" is to "motorboating"...

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First disarm her, THEN charm the pants off of her!

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Yes, please, go on...

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People of Nordstrom

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Mon-Bell Amie!

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Quarantine, day eleven, and my step-sisters are drunk - again!

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Oooh! Somebody STOP me!

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"Cool your tits!"

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What weighs tons, has a trunk, and honks?

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Croissants? Check. Eyeful Towel-Hair? Check!

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Woah. Someone needs a hug...

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Reminder: Comments are welcome! Please see the metaphorical example included...

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Two handed WITH HANDLES!

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She took the Mr Clean Magic Eraser Challenge - and we all lost...

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Rabid Roger Rabbit fan seeking white-hared Romeo for pattycakes and cartoon violence! Speech impediment a plus. No freaks...

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Smother us o sumptuous voluptuous succubus!

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This is Amy. She's a nudist. And she arm wrestles...

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A Pam Tree on the Beach

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