Jizz

A pair in motion...

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My word! <--the truly not-safe-for-work version...

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The Cuppet Show

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Me: Compare her face to her boobs. Engineer: I got this!

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Hi, Ho!

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Chemistry

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Girlfriend: "What the hell kind of floor lamp is THAT???" Me: "If you're THAT curious, then turn her on, yourself!"

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Tattoos don't count!

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This is why Betsy from Etsy can't jet ski...

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I call bottom!

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Smirks are perks!

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How SirJimmy learned to count...

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Ain't no rest for the wicked...

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Gunpowder. Gelatine. Dynamite with a laser beam...

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The many definitions of "bound"...

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Too soon?

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If you're prudent and play it safe, then you won't get Ink on you...

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The only who can tell you, "You can't!" - is YOU...

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Don't overthink it. Others in the comments...

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I'm also okay with kneeling...

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Thanksyou'reapeach!

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A Girl without Freckles is like a Night without Stars...

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Dark Mode Beta for Cameron Diaz (archived)...

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No person is completely wicked, just as no person is perfect. We are all grey...

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I heat up! I cool down. When something gets in my way I go round it...

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Tee'pol, T'pol, Tee'pol, Tee'Paw'ah'olll. I suggest you look in the comments for more...

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Jolene, Jolene, Jolene, Jolene. I suggest you look in the comments for more...

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One of these things is not like the others!

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Always leave 'em wanting more! Spoiler - and more - in the comments...

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What goes up...

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Gawd bless yo mama!

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Necked!

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"Nice pupaes, Chrysalis!"

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When suddenly having to choose and there's no time to think!

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No matter the appetite, everything is a napkin in bed...

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The 1960s called. They want YO MAMA!

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Quarantine, day thirteen, and the onslaught continues...

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Boujee booty-booby boofy beauty!

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"Craps" are better than "slots"... Ready to click?

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Quarantine, day 26. I proposed some new rules for our game of "I'm Not Touching You!"

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Oh, THIS again...

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Quarantine, day thirty. Push came to shove with one of my step-sisters...

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Dancing is a perpendicular expression of a horizontal desire...

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Nicki Minaj rebooting after a firmware update...

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ME: I am NOT voting for Trump! HER:

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HER: I am a proud Trump supporter!!

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Watch once for levitation. Rewatch as need be for prestidigitation...

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Converted crossover content via our good friends at r/AlmostBooze...

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Ho! Boom about! Heave down or eat caulk, me Darlin'!

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Thanks! I hate it...

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Too chesty for Etsy? Let's see...

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To clarify: THIS is what to submit! It's source and other examples of what NOT to submit are in the comments...

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'Dorable the Explorable

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Writhing in agony is better than withering & dying. Ready to click?

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Yeah, well, I was tired of her shit, anyway...

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It's mah Cake Day, Beeyatch!

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This ain't your grandfather's Frankenstein: Jeff Chapman don't build 'em like they used to...

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It's eclectic! Bewbie boobie booby!

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Oh my GAWD! Did you just fart?!? My mouth was open...

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Capture a shadow, dance with the wind, stand in a rainbow, begin at the end...

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