Jizz

A very disappointing development in teledildonics. [NSFW]

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Magic tentacle dildo [NSFW]

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Can't wait for you guys to find out which of my friends...

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Fish vibrators

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You’re a Slizzerd Harry, Expecto Cumplosion

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Penis Drill?

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Sex spices

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Oh no

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“I’m still pissed that you hit your juul while your dick was in my mouth”

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this is brand new

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One day I will impromptu ketchup my pussy for you

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Sit on my face lest ye have no grace

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Sometimes you need to stop and research.

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Potato salad

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I choked my pet turtle and he got a boner.

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Title

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"homework"

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uhh, well,

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Transplant corn dicks

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Using a GTA cheat to cum, I never knew that!

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The meat lube helps the pickle take that big hot dog

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Man legally changed his name to "Big Dick" so that "They niggas will keep my name out their mouth"

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You ever read a sentence and wish you were illiterate so you could have never read it in the first place?

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I'd do a routine on ice...

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Ok then, for an hour I will not have sex with your moms corpse, so then for the rest of time there will never be a moment when someone isn't fucking your mom.

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Something, Something, Monkeys and Typewriters

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Scrumptious

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"Did you cum?"

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"Fuck you right back, bitch-faced bear"

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But no... you wanna turn your vagina into a construction site.

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4 elephant cocks

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Used inflatable cross-dressing vagina pants

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Ejaculated anchovies out of your dick so hard your body gets pushed backwards

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Anus starts salivating

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Murderous, you say?

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We are God’s children and he left us all in a hot car to die

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On the topic of YouTube couples

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Best tldr ever.

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Some enterprising blasphemers turned his corpse into a communal fleshlight

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SLPT: Free lube

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Blowjobs count as anal

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Kayne with a pussy would be breathtaking.

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Shit is a more subtle taste

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One of these 5 sentences has to count

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Hypothetically, how would you have sex with a horse?

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New Orleans Archbishop Says He Burned Church Altar Where ‘Demonic’ Priest Had Dominatrix Threesome

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"Can't watch the video with sound on"

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Tickling satan's prostrate

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As the penis recedes to its cozy inner sanctum, the tip naturally pulls up and away from its normal downward trajectory.

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Let’s talk about this. Would it be beastiality? Scooby has human level intelligence and can consent.... it’s still gross but I don’t think it’s immoral

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It's common knowledge that Bernie Sanders has a giant slobberknocker daddy mayo maker, but could his hotdog truck cock save democracy?

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You're not going to horny jail you're just going straight to federal prison

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Run. Think. Shoot. Dick Gets Hard. Live.

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Like a small elephants trunk

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“I never thought that nut did a loop-see-loop before getting shot straight into a sock. Brutal.”

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Happy International Women's Day.. to my gorilla grip...

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I want to live in a world where I can go into my local grocery store, pick up a bottle of Smucker's Dolphin Pussy Jelly, and just fucking cum myself to death

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You ever flap your loose bussy to let cold air on your colon?

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Gargle his balls... he said

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She got that turbo pussy

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