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Could someone translate this for me? Looks like Japanese to English.... contents MAY be NSFW language ;)

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[nsfw] How much of this is readable due to poor quality, and what does it say?

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Just started to learn Higarana & Katakana, and I decided to illustrate some of the non politically correct mnemotechnic tricks I use in my brain [some are NSFW]

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In 'Death to Smoochy' where they kill the wrong Rhino....Nicely done.

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Does this tattoo on my bottom really mean Catholicism?

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Did anyone else cry?

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I heard we were sharing funny example sencences [NSFW language I guess]

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I'll never forget this word now.

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I mean, whatever works?

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I can't make out much of the text except for some kata and kanji. Please help identify what's written :D (probably nsfw text)

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